We sat in my office, the Junior Warden and I, discussing a few odds and ends of life around the parish. Just as we were finishing, I rose from my chair and she looked at me with a whimsical expression and said, “I feel as if we’re at a crossroads.” I knew what she meant, because part of what we’d been talking about was Alan’s departure. There was a moment of silence between us, and then I said, “Yep, I think you’re right, but it doesn’t have to be bad.”

Whether you’re driving or hiking, there are times when you come upon crossroads, and when you do you make a decision on which way you’ll proceed. Sometimes you know, from previous experience, where each path or road will lead and what it will mean to go there … and sometimes you don’t. What you do know is that each way will be different – your experience will be different one way or the other. It’s true for the paths you decide to take when you go hiking, with the roads you decide to take driving, with the decisions you make in life, and it’s also true with the decisions we make, individually and collectively, within the church.

As a result of individual decisions, we at St. Paul’s have made a choice in the direction we’ll be taking for a while. Fr. Alan, Jessica, and their dear children, Parker and Paige, will be leaving very soon. They decided to accept God’s call to serve another parish, at this time, in large part because the St. Paul’s parish family wasn’t able to find the will to pledge sufficient funds to reasonably guarantee that we’d be able to support his position for the next couple of years without going into debt. That’s fact, not guilt, just fact. I’m very sad about it, because of the partnership in ministry that Alan and I have shared during the past two years and because of the loss this will be to those who have grown close to the Gates family. It’s sad, but it doesn’t have to be bad. It will be up to us, and what we choose to do as we move forward – individually and collectively.

Some parishioners have responded in ways that I’d like to address. One or two have said, “I’m sorry they’ve taken Alan away from us.” No one has taken Alan away from us. We decided to give too little to be able to guarantee pay for him to stay, and God used that to provide Alan and another parish with an opportunity for ministry. We’ve helped to shape him in his ministry; another parish will benefit from that, and for that we can be grateful. Someone asked, “Who are the parish leaders who made the decision not to guarantee Alan’s salary for the next couple of years, and why did they do that?” Alan asked me not to bring the question to the whole Vestry, but to discuss a guarantee of salary for the next two years with the Wardens. We agreed that it would be financially irresponsible, and therefore bad stewardship, to put the parish in debt, not to mention that at the last Diocesan Convention a resolution was passed to discourage parishes from using more than 5% of their endowment principle each year. Even that wouldn’t have been enough to cover the $28,000 shortfall for Alan’s compensation. Our current endowment is only about $500,000, after all. The Vestry already communicated with the parish as a whole that we wouldn’t be able to do that – deficit spending. Someone even asked, “Does St. Paul’s pay the Rector so much that we can’t afford a second priest?” The fact is that I’m compensated at the diocesan minimum for a rector of my experience at a parish of this size, and didn’t receive an increase for two years in order to be able to balance our budget. Someone asked, “What about deep pockets? Isn’t there anyone out there that you could ask for the extra money?” This church doesn’t work that way. We depend upon the shared generosity of each and every one of our parishioners. Some of us have been very generous and others of us have not. We’re a community. All of us depend upon each and every one of us doing the best we can to shoulder our part of the responsibility for Christ’s ministry in this place by paying for the expenses of it. It’s all for one and one for all. That’s fact, not guilt, just fact.

The Vestry and I have tried to follow what we understand to be a biblical pattern of how God treats people in all of this. God always gave people a heads up in the stories of the Bible. That’s what the prophets were for. They’d say, “If you don’t do this, that’s going to happen.” Then they’d say it again: “If you don’t do this, that’s going to happen.” And if they didn’t do it, that’s what happened. Then God would send along another prophet, who said, “This happened because you didn’t do that.” So the Vestry and I, in various ways, over a period of several months, tried to communicate that if pledging and contributions didn’t increase we’d lose a staff member. And that’s what’s happened. Those communications were never intended as a threat, simply a heads up of the cause and effect consequence of what realistically was bound to happen. That’s a fact, not threat or guilt, just a fact.

So what’s going to happen now that Alan’s gone? Following the same biblical pattern of how God treats people, I’m going to communicate what the realistic cause and effect consequences will be for our life in the short-term future and the long term. As Sergeant Friday on Dragnet used to say, “just the facts.” On the books St. Paul’s has over 1700 members. That places us at the level of what’s called a corporate-sized church, requiring multiple staff members to lead ministry programs overseen by the Rector. Week to week, St. Paul’s has the highest average attendance, including kids, of any parish in the diocese – about 305 worshipers each weekend. That places us, at least, at the level of what’s called a program-sized church, requiring less staff leadership and more active, lay-led ministry teams, with the Rector serving as the one who delegates and encourages lay ministry. St. Paul’s has usually functioned like what’s called a pastoral-sized church, with the Rector doing most of the work of ministry and several committees helping with practical matters. No single priest can do all of the services, pastoral care and programs for a program-sized church for long without burning out. The more such a rector tries to do, the shorter that rector will be able to do it. It’s as simple as that.

God has already provided us with invaluable volunteer help for the short-term – help with a few summer services and in coordinating youth events. But what about ongoing worship services, pastoral care, sacraments and other programs? That remains to be seen. There are four options. First, and the least appealing for me, that I’ll try to continue everything as it has been while Alan was with us. The consequence will be burnout – not a pretty picture. Second, also not very appealing because it tends to weaken the vitality of a church; is simply to cut back on programs and services. Third, parishioners will step up and in teams take on the active leadership of various programs in the parish. This will require time, energy and active leadership responsibility – people offering their time and talents at a more committed level. Fourth, parishioners will step up and give more generous financial support to the parish when it comes to pledging and contributions so that we can eventually call someone to succeed Alan in his position at St. Paul’s. These are the choices – not threats, not guilt, just the facts. We do stand at a crossroads. The question is which way we’ll turn, and that will be up to what each of us chooses to do about the stewardship of our money and/or our time and talents.

The Vestry will be studying the book Becoming A Blessed Church, and prayerfully reflecting upon what God wants us to do as we move forward. We may have some tough decisions to make. Please add your prayers to ours – not only to discern which way we should turn as a parish at this crossroads, but also to discern what God wants you to do about it as an individual and integral part of St. Paul’s.

Affectionately in Christ,

Phil +